Nigmabox Rundown (04/5-10/5) The Evils of 100+ Hour Games Are Pure and Vile

KLK Mom Please Stop me from being evil and bad parents control your kids they are wild jojo cosplayersAs of writing this, I am over 30 hours into Persona 4: The Golden Boys, which is an 80-90 hours JRPG made for another 50 hours playthrough, and maybe a 40 hour one following that.  I really do wish I decided to play it on very easy, as I would be able to spend a fifth as much time in the dungeons, which I spent 5-7 hours in during one session as it is the most effective means of gaining levels and not needing to worry about the combat.  Yet, going into the combat after messing around with social links and high school shenanigans feels like it is from a completely different game.  I’m still enjoying it though.

I like to think I was given a large quantity of knowledge from the internet about the early days of the video game industry and learning about many of the beloved classics of old as well as plenty of oddities.  Yet my cone of vision for much of the early PS2 era is oddly fuzzy as I did not get any information about it until ex post facto or from Nintendo Power.  So excuse me for being unfamiliar with this Kickstarter by Harmonix, asking for $775,000 to bring back something called Amplitude.  It certainly looks promising, but it is a hefty sum that I feel warrants a joke to be made about their Dance Central and Rock Band money, even though the publisher probably stole most of that.  Oh, and if the day limit and current funds are any indication, it’s probably gonna fail, unlike Shaq Fu 2, which somehow succeeded!1PGOS The Magical cabbage revlation

But that $775,000 is pennies compared the the cash and dough Activision is investing into Destiny.  While Grand Theft Auto V gambled with $260 million, Destiny’s gonna mess that sideways, as they are allegedly spending half a billion on this game!  That is crazy and I swear, if this, Call of Duty, Skylanders, and World of Warcraft all happen to somehow fail due to this same practice, Then the eighth generation and first era of video gaming shall end with me laughing on a roof and wearing a dumb jacket before being thrown a bottle at for being such a silly billy.  Some men want to see the world burn, but I just want to see the medium of video games to go through a massive shift instead of being a delightful tsunami of entertainment, only causing damages with how bad tsunami is for a city.2KLK Blinded by money bribery and general greed root of all evil and you are the puppetmaster fuck you then zeni man of fuckness

Kyogre basically causes Tsunamis, so I guess I can transition into Pokemon Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire, an oddly named title for the Gen 3 remakes, as I was expecting them to be more along the lines of Raging Ruby and Sizzling Sapphire.  I was also expecting there to be some actual footage shown when they teased there being some after there was nothing.  But after watching the Pokemon show, which involved a man in a pink jump suit trying to find Pokemon items in a child’s house, I got thirty seconds of intro sequences.  It almost makes it less sad that according to the financials that came in, Nintendo’s lost 229 million smackers, with the Wii U projections being far lower than expected.  3DS is doing just fine, while the Wii U has two heavy hitters coming along with a few new announcements likely keeping things afloat.  3KillTime AN Even more unsure expression of the odd varriety guess that is fine bro

Said announcements arrived about a day after the news with news that Nintendo’s doing Skylanders!  More specifically they’re going to make toys that connect to a variety of 3DS and Wii U games in a move that I like to call the Money Snatcher as it will take all the cash from the pockets of people with disposable income.  Which may also include the Chinese, but in a different way as Nintendo’s making systems for emerging markets.  A move that will hopefully seal the deal for them in being profitable again, because they took a big PR hit with this Tomodachi Life controversy.  I don’t want to get into too many details about it, but it turns out that their delightful looking game doesn’t support same sex romance relationships, but I am far more qualified to talk about gender identity and the sort than I am with anything related to the minority I have no first hand familiarity with.  In short, I never so much as met a gay person and I frankly am as disconcerned as a person preparing to outline a story about a monogender utopia can be.4KS Because it is funny for the LOLs

Afloat, much like what the indie game Towns will not be doing, as the Steam greenlight title which was both under Early Access and had the developer switch mid-development, has been left to rot as the game simply isn’t making enough money through sales.  A story more interesting than sad, as it is the only game I can think of which was cancelled after being release.  That is excluding a game like Earth Year 2066, a mess of royalty free Unity assets thrown together in a day and put on steam for $20, under the banner of Early Access, and holder of much criticism the developer not only dismissed, but tried to delete.  It is no longer on Steam, thus proving that some games really do need a publisher if they want to exist, and that Early Access is a very faulty robe to wear.5GUP Casual Wear Normal People Girls Fairly Depressed

Instead, I’ll just focus on upcoming games that will actually be finished by human beings, like Epic Game’s new free to play Unreal Tournament, a series I have zero familiarity with and as such express apathy, and apathy alone.  Sunset Overdrive finally showed off some gameplay, and I have to say that while the game does look like a fun mix of Jet Set Radio, Zombies Ate My Neighbors, and Dead Rising.  While it was presented in a trailer format I like, it was a bad one of those with disembodied voice of Insomniac Games making its exclusivity far more easy to tolerate… Even though I hope Sunset Overdrive 2 goes multiplatform as Insomniac owns the IP from what I can gather.  While WayForward is going to be making their third Adventure Time game, Secret of the Nameless Kingdom, which promises to be a Zelda-esc adventure game, and that sounds cool if they can poop it out in a year better than they did with the last one.  A title so bad I’d think their license would be revoked.  6 silentrinity commit suicide you fucking moron nitwit why are you such a shit kill yourself

Oh, and naturally reviews are going to be limited, as in addition to ending my semester in college, I am going to be gone two days a week, being an office worker.  Meaning my Summer of Sonic may not happen weekly as I’ve planned, oh well.

Advertisements

Please Leave A Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s